The SquashPusher is an odd one, because it doesn't seem to act in self interest but instead is determined to spread discomfort at every opportunity. Although it is a somewhat rare beast, their numbers do seem to be growing, so be on the watch and hold your ground if you spot a potential specimen. The SquashPusher only appears in the busiest of rush-hours and loves to find a carriage that is already bursting with unfortunate souls before doing everything in its power to force its way in via some infernal osmosis, whether or not another train is a mere 60 seconds away.
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| The SquashPusher |
Our researchers have a number of theories regarding this increasingly ubiquitous oddity, the most popular of which is that it needs extremely close human contact to survive, either due to extremely low body temperatures loneliness, or an insatiable urge to spoon and share body odour. Fortunately, defeating this unwelcome traveller is fairly simple as compared to other species of commuter. Sometimes all it takes is a steely gaze and a slow shake of the head, whereas sometimes a more severe deterrent such as a spiked umbrella or flaming boot does the trick quite nicely.
Habitat – Busy train platforms and your personal space.
Special Skills – Deflecting glares, finding space where there isn't any, stepping on toes
Weaknesses –
Blockers, barbed boxing gloves, glowers
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